PewdieCry: Not Lonely A BROmance to romance fanfic
by StoopidCoopid
Summary: Pewdiepie and Cry have been close friends since they started skyping one another. They text, co-op, and video chat in order to stay in touch. However, after a drunken night of tipsy trips and confused feelings, their "friendship" is threatened. It seems like the entire world is against them! (All, except the wonderful world of yaoi fan girls!) M for coarse language.
1. Chapter 1

Pewdiecry: Not Lonely

WARINING! This is a... Yaoi! a BL! Don't say I didn't warn you. If you don't like it, don't read it!

It contains my favorite pairing,

❤PewdieXCryoatic ❤

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the: games or characters mentioned such as the barrels, Stephano, etc.

Also, because both of these guys swear quite a bit, there is a fair amount of coarse language. nothing TOO inappropiate though (my kokoro could barely handle this :,-D)

Crys POV:

I laughed, stumbling over Pewds shoulder, while fumbling over my words. I talked to Scott and Zutes incoherently. And, as if they could understand the meaningless, dizzy language I was speaking, they laughed and chatted back.

Well, fahk, we were drunk, that's just the crap that happens.

The late night crew had gone drinking to celebrate Pewds coming to Florida. Red, Snake, and I had always been able to hold liquor fairly well- I tripped, almost dragging Pewds to the ground with me. Maybe I wasn't that great at it. Snake and Red though, they're another story.

However, after a certain amount shots, and intakes of vodka, even Snake has succumb to extreme drunkenness. He kissed Jund tonight. He WAS drunk after all, but he has always hated Jund.

"You fucker." Snake let out a growl from his throat.

"You pussy." Jund smiled a cocky, amused grin.

"Your mother is a whore."

"And you are a Bastard." Next thing I knew, their lips had crashed together. Snake tackled Scott off of his chair at the bar. Woah.

People began to stare and shout. Correct me if I'm wrong, but, I could swear one of the cat calls or whistles was from Red. I dunno..

I dumped my drink on the both of them, hoping to extinguish the horrible tension in the air. It was like saying: See, we're all weird, so lets get drunk and be happy.

Scott erupted into laughter, and pulled away from Snake. Snake soon collected himself, and also left the floor. I laughed when he tripped over another chair.

"Was Mr. Chair our enemy today or what?" I lean on Pewds a little more.

"Dude, you are so drunk." He groaned.

"He's always drunk. Vodka, hard liquor. He thinks he can drink that stuff and still be sober." Red explained.

"A whole new wooooorrrld!" I suddenly started singing. My mind was failing me. I wanted to stop talking and saying dumb things, but the words wouldn't cease. Damn... Pewds laughed.

"Whatever, you know? I can drive Cry, and Scott home."

"What? No, pewdie. This was supposed to be a way to welcome you here, I'd feel bad if-"

"Really, its no big deal. I had fun, I'm just not that into liquor."

"Alright... Russ and I can handle  
Zutes and Snake." She smiled. Those two seemed to get along nicely. Good. I'm happy they're happy-  
"Urrgggg." I lurched forward,  
cupping my hands over my mouth.

"Are you alright?" Pewdie stopped walking and let me kneel down. Not here. Not now, I can't get sick in public, and look so pathetic. I said I could hold my liquor and I would-

"Blurrggg" No! I'm a man. I got this. "I can... handle this.." Pewds wasn't having it. He moved me towards a garbage can outside a store.

"Cry..."

"No way sir, that is embarrassing as fuck.."

"You'll feel better..!" I held my stomach. It was like he was subconsciously coaxing me.

"L-leave! I can do my buisness by myself..."

"What if you pass out or some shit?! No." I prepared to argue, but my face was already buried in the street can. Gross. This was so embarrassing. I wiped my mouth with the sleeve of my shirt. Pewds patted my shoulder. Cooing in my ear: It's alright bro. You're okay bro.

That made everything so much worse. I wanted to be left alone; I didnt want him to see me like this. Why was I suddenly driving myself crazy with the thought of embarrassing myself in front of some guy? It was like I was suddenly a teenage girl (like those ones that are into yaoi). Damn you liquor. You see what you do to me?

"Oh man.. Is he alright?!" Red called from a distance.

"Yeah. He is just a little sick. I think he'll be okay though." He slung my arm back over his shoulder. "Just a little while longer until we reach the parking garage."

My head was fuzzy when I walked through my door. When we turned the lights of my apartment on, my brained seemed to mentally stab itself from behind my eyes. I started to turn the lights off in the kitchen area. Suddenly remembering the bad taste in my mouth, I walked into the bathroom and brushed my teeth.

"You don't want the lights on?" Pewdie laughed.

"Fuck no." He laughed a even more. I staggered, still a little on the tipsy side. "Make yourself at home, friend." I shut my bedroom door behind me as I dressed. Upon getting a good look at myself in the mirror, I saw how flushed I still looked. 'You're silly' I thought giggling at my reflection. I hope I still remember the party tommorow. The clubbing was fun, and the drinks were cool.

"Yo, Feliks?"

"Yeah?"

"You got a place to stay, right?"

"Oh, yeah bro. I'm staying with a  
few friends."

"They Yankees?"

"Go big, or go home dude." We laughed. I hummed 'a whole new world' when I went back into my room. " The hell. Bro you are so drunk!"

"Correct, sir." I slipped into my bed, prepared for tommorow's hangover. "Pewds!" I beconed.

"What?!" I could hear the TV in my living room. He was comfortable after all. He leaned in my door way.

"Love you~" Oh my God. The drinks, they are purely works of the devil. I prepared to take it back, but he thought it was a joke. Well... I was joking after all, right? He laughed.

"Love you too, bro." I closed my eyes, relieved.

I was horribly drunk.  
I know it didn't actually happen.  
Still,  
Why do I have the memory,  
Of a kiss goodnight

From Feliks?


	2. Chapter 2: Honest Heart

Chapter 2: Honest Heart

Crys POV:

The next day was slow and uninteresting to say the least. I had suffered from my hangover most of the morning, sleeping in past 1 o'clock. Even after awakening, I had rolled around in bed for about twenty minutes.

"I need to stop being so lazy.." I grumbled to myself. As if my brain had suddenly decided to function, a throng of memories came flooding back. The lights of the club, the fast best of the music, the shouts of joyous people, both sober and drunken.

I remember Red and Russ, making out like teenagers..

"Pffft, they're so immature.."

I also remember Scott and Pewdie and Snake.. "Oh my God!" I shot up, out of bed. "How did I forget about Pewdie? How could I forget about-" I entered my living room, sliding on its hard wood floor. He wasn't on the couch, however my TV was still on.

"Fucking Hell man?" I turned it off. I trudged over to my couch and slumped into its cold leather. "Oh yeah, he's staying with someone..." I wished that he would've stayed. We could have co-oped in person, and...

I felt a blush creep upon my face. Why was I so worried about what he thought of me, or if he thought of me in general? It was just Pewdiepie, we are best friends.

We have always joked around about all the stories told by rabid fans. We would say things, dumb in-the-moment things. Telling each other that we loved one another. Calling each other 'sexy beasts' (which, according to Pewdie, is a synonym for Feliks)

"But..." I covered my face with my hands. "Was I 'in-the-moment' ?" Whenever I told him how beautiful I thought he was, my heart would beat faster and I would smile, uncontrollably. "Fuck!"

I think I'm _in love_ with my best friend..

...

Pewdie's laugh rang in my ears as I tapped the keys of my keyboard. Why couldn't he stay alive for five minutes? No matter what game we played, he would constantly die, usually on purpose. However, this time, Bloody Trapland was whooping his ass.

"Just jump over the lavas!" I laughed. This was our PewdieCry time. We weren't recording videos, or worrying about editing. We were unsencored.

"I'm trying!" I laughed as his red cat fell to it's death again. "Hey, Cry," Pewdie said.

"Yeah?" I looked at his face cam, as if we were making eye contact. He did the same. He had a pretty nice face.

"Will I ever see _your_ face?" I smiled. As if he knew I was thinking about his amazing facial features, he stressed the word 'your.'

"Would you like to?" He looked a little shocked. Besides the occasional "plip" or "beep" from the game, both of our rooms were silent.

"Really, man? 'Cause I _am_ getting curious."

"Yeah sure," I shrugged. "It'll be between us gamers." I didn't mind it all that much. The entire late night crew knew what I looked like, what's one more?

Then again, why was I so willing to be open with Feliks? Why was I so anxious for him to ask that question? Let's be honest, I wanted him to see me.

"Lemme' just rig up my camera.." I pressed a few buttons. "There we go." My face appeared on the screen, and Pewdie gasped. He scared me at first, making my green eyes widen.

"Cry is that actually you?"

"U-um, yeah." I stuttered.

"Damn, you're sexy!" I laughed along with him. A sense of pride welled up in me. I had never been so happy to have shown someone my identity. For a man that likes his privacy, that's saying a lot.

Throughout the rest of our conversation, I found myself fixated on my bangs. I moved the mess of brown, wavy hair every couple minutes in hopes of making myself look better. It worried me, as I had been sitting at my computer all day, recording. Pewdie seemed to notice mstorage he actions and expressions, quickly putting the game on pause.

"Cry, let's talk."

"Sure, friend." we both chuckled.

"So, now that I know what you look like, we can hang out?"

"Well, yeah. But, you're going to have to come to the U.S. of A, because, I don't have a passport."

"Yeah, about that." He started. "I am coming to stay in Florida for a while..."

"Oh?"

"Yeah." He seemed to change expressions so suddenly. I was becoming more and more concerned.

"Should I ask why?"

"Please don't." I sighed. I silently prayed that he was okay.

"I can respect that." Sensing the awkward tension, Pewdie quickly changed the subject.

"So Cry, why do you hide your face, you beautiful son of a bitch?"

"Well Pewdie, there's a time in a girls life when she decides upon 'types'. Whether it's blonde, ashen haired, or brunette, like myself, they will choose one. If I hide my face, their little fan girl hearts can run free! I could look exactly how they wanted me to, in there subconscious, thus, I am the sexiest man alive to all my fans." He laughed, taking in sharp amused breaths. He sounded like a hyena. "Therefore, I get ALL of the bitches!" I chuckled making a "come over here" motion with both of my hands.

...

I smiled at the thought of Pewds. Damn, I wanted to see him. I Really wanted to see him.

I looked at my phone, which lay on the counter table.

"Maybe..."


	3. Chapter 3: Earnest Heart

... Sorry... I suck...

I don't really know that THAT many people read/like "PewdieCry: Not lonely." but, I'm taking a super long time with the next chapter, so, sorry. I have NO idea what my schedule will be for updates! So, to those of you who read/enjoy my story, (and even to those who dont) I apologize.

HOWWWWWEVER!

In the meantime, I have decided to host a little contest.

I want to write a oneshot Hetalia fanfic for ChinaxOC

Please, private message me these details if you want me to write a story using an OC of yours:

Name:

Age:

Gender:

Physical Description:

Likes/dislikes:

I'd prefer you not use the name of an actual country, but, if the force compels you, have at it.

Also, they have to, technically, be human. No superheroes/super powers. Also, the mention of having something close to the 'Poland Rule' also counts as a super power. None of that.

Plus, no gender swaps either. The country cannot already be a pre-existing character.

I'm currently finishing up more chapters... I just... Caught some writers block |:T crappy excuse.

I hope I get a lot of participants :D

Chapter 3: Earnest Heart

Jennifer's POV:

I was still making lunch when Feliks' phone rang. I wiped my flour covered hands on my apron.

"Hello?" There was only silence.

"Sorry, I must've called the wrong number!" The male voice spoke hastily.

"No, no, this is Felkis' phone. Are you a friend of his?" Another short pause.

"Yeah, um, not that I'm trying to be rude, but, who the hell are you again?" He sounded slightly annoyed.

"Jennifer... Jennifer Stone. I'm sorry, Feliks is in the shower. I just thought I could take a message for him-" the phone was ripped out of my hands by a dripping wet Feliks.

"What're you doing on my phone?" He said, drying himself with one of two towels he had wrapped around him. One around his neck, the other around his perfect hips. I blushed.

"Um, I heard it ring.. And.." I reverted to my usual tomboy act. "I wanted to be helpful you ungrateful son of a gun." I laughed.

"Fuck you." He laughed back at me before putting the phone to his ear. After a few "yeah"s and "alright"s, he got off the phone. He quickly got dressed, and returned to the living room.

"What's up?"

"Ryan is coming over for a visit."

Crys POV:

I got in my car after talking to Pewdie. Now dressed and clean, I sped down to the address Pewds gave to me. I remember the phone, hearing it as it was picked up, and a girl -in the same apartment as Pewds- answering it. Wasn't he also in the shower?

My cheeks burned. I tried to calm myself down before knocking on the door. I heard a quick rush of footsteps before the door swung open.

The tall Swede stood, with his hair still wet, and a crooked smile plastered across his face. "Cry!" He scooped me up, into his arms and shook me around. God, his grip was incredible.

"Sup, bro?" I managed to choke out. He dropped me.

"I'm so happy you could come. Please, come in."

When I stepped through the door, the smell of good food overwhelmed me. The spacious room contained a few pieces of auburn and brown furniture complimetnted with elaborate artwork. Everything seemed so neat, and tidy, that I was instantly compeled to take my shoes off.

I scratched my head. I felt under-dressed in this home. The living room was like that of a room from a home decor magazine. I straightened my green 'Sup.' sweat shirt. I really felt like a scrub. Nobody wants a scrub.

Pewdie left, entering the kitchen before whispering a few words to another voice. I could hear him speaking quickly with a slight harshness. It was like he was coaxing whomever was in the room.

After a few more words, a girl was dragged before me. She was wearing a flour covered apron, with blue jeans. Her hair was tied into a messy bun. Who-

"This must be Jennifer." I said, shifting uncomfortably.

"Yeah... Are you the guy I spoke to on the phone?"

"Yeah... Um, why do I feel like your name rings a bell..?" I stared at her and Pewdie as they stood side by side. "A lot of bells, actually."

"Could it be because of the rock, Jennifer, from Amnesia?" Pewdie cocked his head at me. Jennifer seemed instantly annoyed with that statement. Her face twisted into an irked scowl.

"Probably." I smiled.

"I don't appreciate my 'character' being a fat lump of dirt, Feliks!" Pewdie laughed as the shorter female began complaining. I looked at Jennifer, studying her features carefully.

'She is anything but fat.' I thought. She had dark brown skin and red hair. 'It's almost an auburn color, but a little darker, I guess. And she has curves.' I looked again. 'Lots and lots of curves..'

"Damn." I chuckled to myself as she and Pewdie argued.

"Hm?" She questioned.

"Ah, uh, nothing. I mean, you're really pretty Jen."

"Thanks..." She blushed a little. It was immediately wiped away. "My name is Jennifer."

"I'll still call you Jen." She sighed. I smiled again. It's not that I particularly disliked Jen, but there was something about her that made me a little angry. We had said less than 20 words to each other and I could already tell that I wouldn't become any more than an acquaintance to her. Was it because she and Pewdie were staying together? What if they were dating or...

'Well,' I thought. 'I shouldn't get ahead of myself. He was with that Marzipan girl, right?'

"So," Pewdie started. "Do you want some lunch? Make yourself comfortable, bro." We walked into the living room. I sat down in a comfy chair. "Jennifer makes the best pizza, I'll bring you a slice."

"Uh, sure." I hadn't eaten at all this morning. Well, fahk. I was in a rush, that's just the crap that happens.

"Yo, Feliks, grab me a soda!" Jennifer yelled after him.

"Okay." She slumped into the couch next to me.

"So," she started. "How do you and Feliks know each other?"

"Uh..." I tried to compile a lie. "I was a foreign exchange student in Sweden for a while.. During highschool." I couldn't let her know that I was Cry. So many people knew who I was, already. This could get dangerous.

"Really?" She asked, smiling slightly.

"Yep."

"Is that so?" Her small smile transformed into a long, wry one with the flow of her words. "You know, I think I would've known you, if that IS the case."

"How so?" I could feel a nervous sweat breaking on my face.

"I was the only foreign exchange student from the states in Feliks' highschool." Damn! I was caught in my lie. "Besides that, I'm pretty sure I know who you are."

Shit! What should I do? What could I do? What _can_ I do?

"I was almost certain of your identity when I answered Feliks' phone. It just took my brain a while to process." I actually considered running out of the apartment right then. I could have just ran; pretend that I had never met Jen, and deny ever knowing her at all. Instead, I sighed. "How are you Cryaotic?"

"Just fine, sir." She let out a small laugh.

"I suppose now, you are going to snap a picture of me, and run off to post it online, or something?"

"No, of course not. I really can't stand the fan girls that stalk you online." She rubbed her chin, turning a light shade of red. "Um, so, why _did_ you choose the name Cry?"

The more we talked, the more I began to like her. She was a regular fan; I didn't really have to worry about her possessing faulty trust.

I also learned that she has quite a fondness for 'Feliks.' She had known him for quite a while, and -like her infamous character Jennifer- had an enormous crush on him.

"Even with my fortunate circumstances, I know he and I will never be 'an item.' You know, if that's what you want to call it."

"Circumstances?" I asked.

"Well, yeah, didn't he tell you?"

"Tell me what?" I was starting to get anxious.

"The... Reason that he's here... In the U.S" I nodded. There was a small pause, as if she was debating whether or not to tell me.

She bit her lips. "He and Marzia broke up."


	4. Chapter 4: Lovely Heart

**Is the cake really a lie? If not, then let me be the first to eat all of it! I eat when I'm stressed... (I need to break that habit) Recently, all my wifi just fell apart, so I have no wifi. Also, I'm kind of moving, so cleaning and such has been a big, time consuming pain in the butt! But it's also summer :D so I hope to update more often after I've gotten settled in and after I get my Internet to connect again. *is sick of sitting in random buildings that has free wifi whilst carrying her laptop, cellphone, ipad, etc***

**Haha, I'm loitering! :D**

**Plus, I've chosen the winner of the "OCxChina hetalia fanfic contest" and will have that posted soon too!**

**That was really fun and I want to do it again :)**

**If you guys have other hetalia pairing suggestions, comment or PM me**

**I'm going to shut up now :)**

Chapter 4: Lovely Heart

Crys POV:

"What?" I asked. Jen made a face as Pewdie walked into the room. He carried three slices of pizza and sodas. The man was like a trained waiter.

"Here you go." He handed Jen an orange soda.

"Thanks." Her voice was quiet and meek. He turned to me.

"I hope this is okay." He handed me a coke.

"Y-yeah, this is fine." I focused mainly on Jen. She suddenly shut up when Pewds walked in. Maybe I wasn't supposed to know about the break up? Well, that _would_ explain why he was so secretive about coming to the US. But, why wouldn't he tell me? Is it because he was embarrassed about the break up? Or, was he embarrassed about getting kicked out? Still, he told Jen, and not me-

"Alright, what the hell happened while I was gone? This tension is annoying as shit." I hadn't noticed how quiet we had all been. Crap.

"Uh, nothing. We were just discussing.." Oh man! "We were discussing food. You know, Jen likes to cook and stuff..." I'm such a horrible liar! Pewdie could tell too; his eyes narrowed with suspicion.

"Sorry to interrupt." Pewdie sat down beside me. "Continue." I looked at Jennifer. I didn't know shit about cooking.

"So, Cry, um, that's what meringue is made out of. Egg whites, uh, do you get it now-"

"You told her you were Cry?!" Pewdies eyes widened and shifted between Jen and I. She facepalmed. "Dude, if that's what you were talking about, I'm cool. You don't have to lie to me about it." We all looked at each other.

"Whew!" Jen forced an eager sigh. "We thought you'd be angry."

"Yeah." I played along.

"That's between you and Jen, Cry. It doesn't bother me."

That was way too close. Obviously, I wasn't to tell Pewdie that I knew anything about his break up. What if I slipped up and said something? I'm going to have to tell him that I know sooner or later.I feared for our friendship.

"Anyway," Jen started. "I just texted Stephi and Phil. They said they'd be over in 15 minutes."

"Okay." Pewds said, pushing his hair back. His perfect blonde hair...  
"Should we tell them you're Cry, or do you not care?" I snapped back to reality.

"I'd rather you not..."

"That's cool, I just didn't want to slip and say something that would make you pissy..." Despite him saying that he was 'cool' I couldn't help but question his answer. He wouldn't make any eye contact with me. When he did, he looked a little irritated, or angry. I can't tell if he was angry at me, or at something else. He was just... Different..

Fifteen minutes sure went by fast. A loud, obnoxious knock echoed through the apartment. Before Pewds could open the door, a short figure stormed in. He was followed by a tall man, who looked embarrassed and fairly pissed off.

"Well, come right fucking in..." I grumbled. Jen laughed; I smiled.

"Feliks, are you ready for an epic night bro, that is unless, you've already had one with Jennifer?" The shorter man spoke. Jennifer shot out of her chair.

"What the hell? Eat crap and die, Phil!" He only laughed.

"C'mon Jennifer, have more self confidence! With a figure like that, you could get many men to tap-" a firm hand slammed down onto his shoulder.

"Shut up, you stupid imbecile." The second man had a thick French accent.

"Correct me if I'm wrong; but, by any chance, is your name Stephano?" I asked, sticking my hand toward the French man with wavy golden hair.

"Stephen, actually." He shook it.

"I'm Phil." The shorter man pushed his hand toward me. He could have only been five-six or so. His hair was pink, but slowly got light blonde, the longer it got. It seems he attempted to tastefully dye his long hair. I'd like to describe him as a: want-to-be-hipster. He was trying way to hard.

"So, Phil and Stephen?" I raised an eyebrow, then turned to pewdie. "Did you base all of your characters on your real friends." He laughed.

"Not all, but most." His laugh was amazing.

"At least your character isn't a rock." Jen laughed.

"Hey, I'm a dead pig!" Phil chuckled.

We all decided to leave before the light hearted joke turned into a rally of insults. Phil drove around, eventually pulling into the parking lot of a mall.

None of us really bought anything. We just looked in stores and at clothes. Being the nerd that I am, I had to check out a few gaming stores. I found the best games to co-op on. When I went to show Pewdie, he smiled.

His smile, it wasn't real. Usually, he would act like a complete lunatic. He'd jump up and down like a little kid, but he just smiled, and offered to pay. We generally fight over who has to pay, and end up splitting it even.

"What is up with Feliks?" Jen asked whispering in my ear.

"I don't know, but its creepy. He's been so quiet and calm.."

We left the mall, only because it was closing. Even if we went into every store, we would probably hang around all day, and loiter. It was just too much damn fun.

We hit a club afterward. Prolonging the night was our mission. Phil sped down the road, and made at least 5 illegal U-turns. By the time I got in there, I was motion sick. Teens and their bat shit insane speeding!

Phil was young, he could have only been 19, so he enjoyed every bit of his night out. Stephen drank a little, while talking to different people, but mostly to Jen and I. Jen didn't seem to drink much. She mostly danced, which she was not very good at.

I didn't do much of anything. If I drink too much, I might say more random bull that I really don't want to say. I wouldnt drink. If I don't drink, I won't have the nerve to dance. Thus, I didn't do much of anything at all.

Pewdie hammered down more drinks then Scott on pizza night; And they just kept coming. He didn't really move either. He looked like he was thinking. He was deep in his own drunken thoughts.

Once he turned to look at me. His gaze was so judgemental and piercing, I was forced to look away first.

We finally decided to go home around 3 in the morning. Stephen, Jen, and I sat next to each other in the back. Pewdiepie sat in the passenger side, suprisingly alert. You could still smell the alchohol on him. Phil drove all of us to the apartment. He was tired by the end of the night, thank God he actually drove like a _normal_ person.

'From the apartment, to my car, to my own apartment' that was my main focus. I said goodbye to everyone, and was the first to leave.

I couldn't get Pewds off of my mind the entire drive down to my place. His stern face, his locks of blonde hair he was constantly furling. I hated that I fawned over him like a teenage girl. I hated that I would get butterfly's when I thought about him. About what he could do... To me.. I loved that I would get this rush over and over again. I loved him...

"Ahhgggg!" I was so confused. I walked into my apartment and threw myself onto the couch, face first. Well, fahk if I know why I did that. I've just seen the girls in romance flicks that do that all the time. Then they go:

"Ughhhhh!" I don't know how this was supossed to help! Grabbing a spoon, I rummaged through my freezer for ice cream. I shoved a spoon full of vanilla into my mouth. "Well, this helps, I guess." Maybe my sister knows what she's doing when she pouts?

Suddenly, there was a knock at my door. I looked through the peep-hole.

"Speak of the devil." It was Pewdiepie. I unlocked the door and opened it. He stood, straight faced, with good posture.

"Ryan.." I got chills when he said my name.

"Yes?" He didn't reply.. "Did you drive here? Do you know how dangerous that is?" He smiled before sliding his car keys into his jacket pocket. His icy blue eyes were blood shot. He smiled a kind, yet sad smile. He took a step closer to me. "What are you doing here?" His hand quickly wrapped around my waist, pulling me close to him.

"Why don't I show you?"


	5. Chapter 5: Intimate Heart

**I want to say thanks to all of you who have followed or favorited me. And thanks to those who have just been reading and visiting.**

**Chapter 5,**

**Finally!**

**Now to the yaoi :3**

Chapter 5: Intimate Heart

Cry's POV:

Pewdie forced me onto the couch, still grasping my hips firmly with his left hand. He held my chin with his right.

"Pewdie!" I yelled angrily whenever his lips would tear from mine for air. "Stop!" He paused, looking at me with hungry eyes.

"What is it?" His accent seemed to thicken. "Don't you like me?" He growled, nipping on my ear.

"But.." I swallowed hard. "This isn't right..."

"You're right, would you rather bend over?"

"Pewdie!" I could feel all my anger rise within me. "What do you think you're doing?!" He moved down to my collar bone and neck.

"I think I'm taking back what I believe is mine."

"Y-Yours?" I could feel my entire body shake. "You're drunk! I could taste the liquor on your lips!" I began pushing him away, but he wouldn't budge. "You're just confused! In a little while, you will get back together with Marzia." He hesitated at the mention of Marzias name, then, he continued lower on my neck, to my sweet spot.

"I know you really like her. You know you really like her! You're just tired, and lonely, and confused..." I fought to get the words out. He stopped. He looked down at me again.

"Ryan.." His expression changed. "Do you know how crazy I got when I saw you with Jennifer? Jen this, Jen that! I know, you must like her, right?! You even told her you were Cry! Why do you trust _her_ so easily?"

I felt a pang of guilt. I had only been talking to Jen because she and I were the only ones who knew about the break up. Nothing else. "Whether I'm drunken or completely sober, it all still hurts! So you know what it's like to be rejected twice?! This time by..." I wanted him to complete his sentence, but he jumped to another. "I wouldn't care if you fell in love with her. I wouldn't care if I was supposed to be '_cool_' about it! I wouldn't care if Marzia came to the door right now!"

He seemed so lost, so hurt, so needy, sweet and vulnerable. His eyes were soft, and pleading, begging for an outlet for their emotions. _All _the damned feels!

"I'd still want you." He shrank away from me, and sat at the other end of the couch. I slowly sat up, looking at him.

I inched closer, kissing his lips softly. I considered sitting on is lap.

I don't know what I'm doing. I really have no fucking idea.

He wasn't like anyone I've ever dated before. I wanted to console him, to make him feel loved. I didn't want him to guess and worry about dating his best friend. Not like I did.

"Pewdie..." He put his hands on my hips again. I liked the feeling of his hands on my lower back, and I laughed at the thought of telling him that.

Cautiously, he trimmed the hem of my shirt with his fingers.

'Im not giving into you..' I thought.

He did the same with the hem of my pant leg.

'Im not giving into you, you stupid drunkard..'

"Isn't this what you want?" He gently started to force me onto my back. 'I said, Im not giving into you..!'

"Take them off, Feliks."


	6. Chapter 6: Forgotten Heart

Chapter 6: Forgotten Heart

**I thought I should just let you know...**

**Cry joined the Snund fandom.**

**K? Grt. Bye.**

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Crys POV:

I awoke to sound of chirping birds, and the pitter patter of rain. I grumbled before smashing my face back into my pillow. My mind slowly began to process exactly what happened last night.

Trying to make sense of it all gave me a headache. I tried to ignore the complete feeling of uncertainty that I had suddenly gained.

I had to trust my gut, and get this over with. When I looked over to my right, Pewds wasn't there. Figures.

"Well, it couldn't have been a dream." I said, picking up my scattered clothes from the ground. "He just, one-night-standed me... Dammit." I walked into my bathroom.

While stepping into the shower, I started to notice the several bruises and red marks that covered my body. I squinted at them, they were so light, I couldn't tell if they were actually there or not. The more I focused, the more undefinable they became. I couldn't find my glasses after all.

I just hopped into the cold water, not daring to wait for it to heat up. I tried to wash the spots away, but they remained.

I was so fucking embarrased. He tore me apart last night, as shown by all the love marks and bites. I was stupid to think that it would last, even for a moment. He was drunk. He probably doesn't even remember. And still, I believed him.

How could I not?! He just seemed so sincere. He seemed so real, so... So amazing... And I wanted it so badly. I know that I said I didn't, I know that it seemed as though I was doing everything in my power to get him away from me, but, it wasn't like that.

I really wanted to pull him in, to yell something cliche. "Make me yours, Pewdie!" Even in the heat of the moment, I kept my head on my shoulders, and my mind under control. I knew that he would do this; he would regret the night and leave. I was just wishing that he wouldn't.

It was like I was calculating the moment. Somehow, throughout all my intelligent weighing and balancing of probabilities, I still let my judgement cloud up. I allowed myself to let go of reality. I slipped away from it all. I let him do whatever he wanted, and now our friendship was -most likely- destroyed.

Thinking about it made me sick. I quickly slumped over the toilet bowl. I opened my mouth as if something would come out, but nothing did. I made a few noises of frustration.

"You ass! I can't believe I gave it to you-" Holy fuck! My mind started to spin, and my heart started race. I lost my virginity to Pewdiepie. I lost it to Pewdiepie. H-he was my first time. I hadn't even thought about it. H-how could I lose it to a one-night-stand, let alone another man!?

I couldn't take it any more. I wrapped my keys in my fingers and grabbed my cell phone.

I heard a few rings, before the iconic click. Tightening my grip around the steering wheel, I waited for the comforting voice.

"Mmm.. Yes?"

"Hello, Jen?" I didn't give a damn that she was in love with Pewdie, she was the only person I could talk to that would understand.

There was a pause.

"You okay Cry? You sound sort of strange-"

"I need to talk to you." I blurted hastily. "In person. I'll be over in 20 minutes."

"Oh, okay! I'll be ready by then." Suddenly a heard a deep voice purring into the phone.

"Chut, belle. Unless, you don't want to sleep?" The voice was definatley male. It was too quiet for me to tell who it was though.

"Eep! No, not now! I got to go Cry, see you." The call abruptly ended.

That sure was weird. But -I mean this in the least self entered way possible- I have my own problems to deal with.

...

I knocked on the door, before Jen opened it.

Practically plowing her over, I walked into the living room, and sat down.

"What's wrong Cry? Why're you-"

"Look, I've got to tell you something." I buried my face in my hands. "And you're not going to like it."

"What?" Her eyes were full of concern. Just the kind of concern I was looking for.

"I slept with Pewdie... I know that you like him, and that I suck for backstabbing you like that, but-"

"I-it's okay, trust me."

"But its not okay. I-"

"Belle, do you want to make breakfast, or should I?" We were interrupted by a tall man. He brushed his golden hair back with his hand. "Uh... Hello." His French accent muted the H in hello.

"Hi Stephen." Jennifer leaned in towards me, whispering in my ear.

"Stephen and I sort of hooked up last night..."

"Oh!" I could feel my face turn pink.

"We didn't _do_ that!"

"Oh."

"Don't worry. I... I'm over Feliks... I.. I can't chase a man that is in love with someone else."

"In love?"

"Yeah, he came home really late last night with this really goofy look on his face. I tried to ask him what was wrong, but he shoved right past me."

"Did he?"

"Yeah, obvious look of love... What do you have to say to _that_ Cry?"

"Look, he isn't in love with me. He totally regrets the entire damned thing." I threw my head back, looking at her. She was smiling a wry smile (like only she can.)

"Where are your glasses?" She smiled like she knew everything.

"I don't fuckin' know."

"Still, maybe he enjoyed it, you don't know until you ask him how you did."

"Well," my face turned bright red. I felt compelled to hide myself in my hoodie. "That doesn't matter! And I'm not talking to him..!"

"Then why did you come _here, _in Feliks' house of all places?"

"Because.. I didn't know what to do! I-I-I'm losing my mind! I can't talk to Russ or Red about this-"

"You're going to lose your mind if you _don't_ talk to Pewdie about this, anyway. I can't help you."

"Yeah, that's not the only thing I've lost thanks to Pewds."

"What?"

"I lost it to him." I hadn't even remembered Stephen in the kitchen, until he let his head slowly come into view from the kitchen arch way. His mouth was open slightly, like he was gawking. Obviously, he was eavesdropping.

"Uh... I just wanted to know how you wanted your eggs.." His brown skin was slightly red. I facepalmed.

"I'll have scrambled. Cry?"

"Ugh.. Whatever you want to make, I guess."

"Nice damn save." Jen whispered sarcastically.

For a guy that is usually so secretive, I sure am fucking this up. I don't want anyone besides the few that already knew about this find out: Pewds, Jen and I. It's too embarrassing. No one else can know about my night with Pewds.

"I smell breakfast!" Speak of the devil.

"Feliks, you're awake early this morning."

"Awake? I never really slept. Who could sleep with you and Stephen being so damn loud!" Jen is a pretty loud girl, but I started to doubt the whole "I am holier than thou" thing she has been pulling on me. Maybe she and Stephen were lying? Maybe they did more than what they said? Whatever. At Least Stephen stayed with her last night.

Pewdie looked over at me. "Sup, Cry?"

"Sup." I didn't even bother to make eye contact with him.

"Uh... Why don't we leave you two alone?" Jen pulled Stephen put of the kitchen, whom was still holding eggs in his hands.

Silence. Nothing but really awkward silence.

"Cry-"

"What?"

"Don't be mad at me." He sat down on the couch taking Jens spot. For some weird reason, that pissed me off. "I did what I thought was appropriate." Probably because Jen was there for me at te very least.

"Leaving in the damn middle of the night? That's appropriate all right!"

"Look, I didn't want Jen or the guys to suspect anything. At first, I thought I was just going to your house to talk. Then, things got crazy, I _went_ crazy. I was so drunk. I feel like I forced myself onto you, or something. I was afraid that if anyone else found out, you'd be embarrased. What I have I done to you?" His eyes sank somewhere near the floor. Probably to the pits of Hell. That seemed to be where he was coming from. He felt awful, I felt awful.

"Pewds," I could feel my expression change. I sort of wanted to keep being stubborn, to get on his nerves a bit. But hearing how sad and guilty he sounded, it was enough to make a grown man cry. "You didn't do anything to me! I just wanted you to stay. I would've rather had you wake me up and tell me this."

"I wanted to. But, you looked so peaceful." I felt a blush creep on me. "Well, that and you're a really heavy freaking sleeper; little nudges and slight bumps weren't cutting it." He laughed. I frowned. "Aw c'mon! I would've had to push you off of the bed to wake you up!" He got me there. I started to smile, then laugh. Laughter was so contagious.

We eventually found ourselves leaning on each other for support. It reminded me of his first day in Florida. When we had finally sobered up, I prepared to kill the mood with a serious ass question.

"Pewds, how am I supposed to know that you're telling the truth? That you really wanted to stay with me that night? That I wasn't some poor virgin you could pick on?"

"You don't trust me?" He frowned a bit. Somehow, the little crinkle in his eyebrow was attractive.

"I dunno!" There was a long pause.

The pause turned into complete silence, which lasted too long. He looked like he was trying to come up with a really good reason why I should trust him. Either that, or he was angry. Or about to give up on all of it.

It's not like the reason had to be that great. He and I both knew that I was hoping he would give me _any_ reason to forgive and trust him.

"Cry, do you remember the first night I came here?"

"Yeah."

"How much of it do you remember?"

"A pretty good amount..."

"Do you remember, around twelve in the morning, you went to bed?"

"Yeah. Yeah, I guess."

"Do you remember someone kissing you? You were so out of it, you probably don't..."

I had always thought it was my own drunken imagination. I didn't think that Pewdie actually kissed me.

"Pewds... Geez." I didn't know what to say, really. I just wanted to say his name over and over. "You like me?"

"I've liked you for quiet a while now..." Pewds. Pewds. Pewds. "That's why I didn't want to make you angry, and left. I wasn't trying to upset you, I was trying to protect your feeling- oof!"

I hugged- no- tackled him. I had forgotten that he and I were practiaclly the same size, for a moment. (give or take 3 or so inches)

Finally, Pewds. You were mine to hold. That's all that mattered. Screw height, and the world for all I care! I could say he was mine. I can't even describe how fucking good that felt.

"S-so we're dating now? You forgive me?"

"Yeah!" I looked at him. We pressed our foreheads together. His eyes were so blue.

"Hey, uh, I almost forgot." He quickly snatched something off of the side table, and handed it to me.

"My glasses!" I rubbed the lens on my sweat shirt.

"Yeah, um, I was sort of wearing them during..."

"Oh! Well then.." I blinked a few times, placing the rims on my nose. "That's better."

"You look nice with glasses on. Besides that, how bad is your eyesight? I can't see shit in those."

"Pretty bad."

"Gimme a number?"

"No."

"How is it that you even got here without crashing? You're as blind as a bat."

"Luck I guess." I laughed.

"Well, you better be careful, or I'll kick yor ass."

"Yeah, I know." We leaned in to kiss. Our lips barely brushed past each other when the door flew open.

The sound of it nearly flying off of its hinges was incredible, and it scared the crap out of Pewds and I.

We quickly parted.

"Yo! Is Stephen here?" Great. Thanks Phil.

"Yeah, he's with Jen." I said standing up with Pewdie.

"Ooh. Sexy time?"

"I don't think so." Pewdie laughed.

"At least the gang is here. I'm going to go get some food if that's okay."

"Sure, whatever." Pewdie said hastily. Phil just rolled his eyes.

Pewdie and I stood, as nonchalantly as possible holding hands behind our backs.

This will be our little secret.

...

**Well. There. Now, I shall watch a horror film and not be able to sleep. More chapters to come.**

**EDIT: soooo I created a poll for the first time! It would mean a lot to me if you would check out my profile page and vote there. Also, I have no idea how this works, so if you have any tips for me, don't hesitate to PM. :) thnxbye**


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